Lindsay Lohan poses seductively on the cover of US magazine Paper - declaring "I am what I am." The actress stars in a sultry photo shoot for the style mag and defends her hard-partying ways.
Lohan, 21, insists her troubled year - that saw her arrested and doing several stints in rehab - is down to her family woes and the bright lights of Hollywood.
She said: "I had a lot going on in my life and that was a way of hiding from it. "I hadn't seen my dad [father Michael was in jail for two years on DUI and other charges]; I had a lot of work stress because I was constantly working and never took time to stop.
"Everything was go-go-go, and the easiest thing was to run away from it, going out and drinking at night.
"You know, you don't have to think when you let go sometimes. But I didn't realize it was getting in the way of my work - what I've worked for my whole life."
But her multiple stints in rehab have changed her attitude, she insists. And she said she felt she had been unfairly targeted because of her fame - and said much her behaviour was not that unusual for someone of her age.
She said: "There's not really much else to do when you're sitting in a treatment center. It's like, 'Why am I here? Let's think.'
"I wasn't even 21-years-old.
"It was like my college years - and it was just all photographed."
The troubled starlet recently posed in a nude photo spread as Marilyn Monroe for New York magazine. And now, after a series of unsuccessful movie releases including Georgia Rule and I Know Who Killed Me, she's focused on getting her career back on track.
She says: "Right now I just want to find a great script, a great role.
"I was so used to working and working and working, and for a good few months there was nothing for me to do. Now I know what it's like to be an out-of-work actor, and how much it scares me. I am what I am.
"They [film producers] either want to take a chance or they don't, is how I see it.
"I never feel like I have to do anything. I wouldn't be if I didn't want to be. "It suits me."
She also says she finds the constant media attention difficult. She told the publication: "Some days I just want to have my day and not have to deal.
"This morning I got in the car and I was like, not today.
"It's a job in itself. And I'm the last person who feels that I need to get photographed."
She told her assistant during the interview: "I'm gonna go home after this and just lock myself in my house and lay down for a minute."
And she says she has reconciled with her father.
She told the March 2008 issue of the magazine: "[It] is good for my whole family.
"It's healthy."
She also told the March 2008 issue of Paper that she was planning a charity trip to the African country of Kenya to work with underprivileged children.
She said: "I'd like to go under the radar, that's my goal.
"I don't want to go and bring the whole scene with me; that's not what I would be going for."
By Gavin Wilson, Mar 02 2008 © Copyright 2008 - Showbiz Spy
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